I know that most people don’t care, but fireworks are illegal within the city limits of Seattle. That means don’t light them off, please. I have become that gnarly old neighbor lady when it comes to fireworks because of our poor dog. She is terrified of fireworks and this holiday is always filled with misery for her. When people light off rows of firecrackers in the street and think they’re cool, I’m fighting back tears because it makes me so sad to see her panting, shaking, moaning, pacing, and cowering. So, please, go somewhere else to light off your fireworks. Somewhere away from animals. And, away from libraries, too, please.
I have a huge fear that one of the two libraries I’m watching over this summer will either burn down or flood. I’ve already called the fire department once because a neighbor near one of the libraries was burning stuff too close to the library. I also always think there’s going to be a dead body in the trunk of my car whenever I’m about to open it, so, yes, I do have a history of irrational fears, but still. Books are no match for fire or water, so I fear them both.
Our poor dog, though, cannot be reasoned with. Her fear of explosions is deep and real. She is now also afraid of rain and wind and thunder, which I can’t do anything about. But, if you start lighting off fireworks on our block today, I’m going to run out there and get all granny on your ass and threaten to call the cops. I’m sorry that it’s come to this, but don’t say you weren’t warned.